Kelly Clarkson’s new music video for “Dark Side” has hit the Interweb!
While I was praying for “Let Me Down” to be the American Idol’s third single off “Stronger,” I’ll admit that “Dark Side” is a good jam…especially when you have the privilege to hear it live. You can really hear that famous Clarkson rage.
Anywho, the video isn’t a favorite of mine, but I have to support Team Clarkson and show it to my millions of followers! And by millions…I mean my mom, roommates and the cats <3
I have to say, Kelly is looking good! Get it girl.
With the weekend coming to a close, I think you could use another J.Lo jam to get your spirits up before a case of the Mondays hit.
‘Jenny From The Block’
There are many, many reasons to the love this song/music video. Don’t worry, I’ll only be highlighting two:
1. Did you know that Jennifer is from the Bronx…more specifically the South-Side? Don’t feel bad if you didn’t…she reminds us every time the chorus hits.
2. One of my hobbies is reminiscing about celebrity couples from the past. J.Lo not only provided one of the greatest/awkward celebrity couples, but whored it out in the music video. Hint: Bennifer.
Even though this song is basically J.Lo telling everyone about all the great shit she has…I’m still into it. I like hearing about the rocks that she got and that she used to have a little, but now she has a lot.
Now lets discuss the most important aspect of this video…Bennifer. I have always wondered why Ben Affleck participated in this video…J.Lo must have really had his ass whipped.
I can only imagine the boatloads of harassment Affleck took after this video was released and especially after his engagement with the singer ended. I can practically hear Matt Damon asking Ben “Remember that time you slapped J.Lo’s ass on a yacht and it was in that music video?” Poor Ben.
One good thing about Bennifer…J.Lo really turned Ben from a scruffy dude to a leading Hollywood man who uses hair gel and wears expensive suits.
J.Lo – Thank you for getting Ben on point and prepping him for his next Jennifer…Garner that is.
Every once in a while I get on a certain musical artist kick.
During this kick, I basically listen to one artist over and over until my roommates can’t stand it anymore. Obviously, I don’t get sick of the music..hence the kick. This month I am on a J.Lo/Jenny from the block/Jennifer Lopez/Selena kick.
J.Lo has provided me, along with the world, great jams that have the ability to fill the void in a variety of occasions and moments.
Below I would like to highlight a few of my favorite J.Lo jams.
‘Waiting for Tonight’
Who hasn’t gotten up on a Friday morning and thought “God, I can’t wait for tonight.” I do this everyday…even on Mondays.
“Waiting for Tonight” is one of those songs that you play at the party, before the party. Whenever this song comes on, I automatically turn on my green laser strobe lights, whisper inappropriate phrases in Spanish, glue jewels over my whole body and dance my face off in a manner that would make J.Lo proud.
If you recall, “Waiting for Tonight” was release in 1999. Yes, that was before we called Jennifer J.Lo! Even though it’s over 10 years old, this song still entices people to anticipate tonight and try to dance like Jennifer…but fail miserably .
J.Lo – with “Waiting for Tonight” you officially earned my endorsement. Get it girl.
Stay tuned…there’s more J.Lo coming up…
Last Thursday Nicki Minaj released the musical video for her single “Starships.” I have finally gotten around to watching it and after viewing and reviewing the video I have two things to say:
- Holy crow
- I’ll never get those four minutes back
From the first time I heard “Starships” I have always had a bit of an issue with the song. I feel like Nicki is trying to jam three different genres into one song. Is it a pop song or a rap song…could it be house music? Does anyone know? Has anyone asked Lil’ Wayne? He might know.
The music video does not help me answer the question either. It’s basically Nicki running around on a Hawaiian beach…nothing special. There is also a spaceship and men dressed in paint and cloths. Been there, seen that.
Nicki – get it together.
A few days ago I was cruising home from Philadelphia and decided to plug my sweet, sweet iPod in and hit the shuffle button. After a boatload of Britney and Rihanna jams, a song by Eminem ft. Dr. Dre popped up. The song is called “Business” and it encompasses a good beat and some superb lyrics. My fav: ”Bitches and gentlemen it’s showtime.”
You can find “Business” on Marshall’s fourth album “The Eminem Show.” It was released July 7, 2003 and was the fifth single off the album.
I feel like you should give this song a listen for the sole fact that Eminem and Dr. Dre are using super hero language, such as:
- “Holy wack, unlyrical lyrics Andre, you’re fuckin’ right”
- “To the rapmobile, let’s go…”
- “Gee willikers Dre, holy bat syllables”
The first time I heard this sweet, sweet jam was when I was a freshman in college. I’m pretty sure this song changed my world…for the better. Fergie taught me what my lady lumps were and how I can utilize them in order to get free stuff.
The song doesn’t just include Fergie, the rest of The Black Eyed Peas are bopping around the music video too.
“My Humps” is one of those songs that gets trapped in your head for months…you can’t get rid of it. I listened to this for two semesters! I guess others were having the same experience, “My Humps” reached #3 on the Billboard Top 100.
Fun Fact: Will.i.am originally wrote this song for the Pussycat Dolls.
Unbeknownst to me, a lot of people disliked this song. Rolling Stone conducted a poll on the 20 most annoying songs and “My Humps” was voted numero uno.
But everything changed in 2011 when the Black Eyed Peas decided to retire “My Humps.” Gasp!
Will.i.am told MTV News, “For a while, [we did] My Humps and then it got to the point where we didn’t want to play My Humps no more. You know, ’cause, ‘I met a girl down at the disco,’ I just didn’t want to say that no more, lyrically.”
Well just because you don’t want “to say that no more,” doesn’t mean I don’t want to hear it…how rude! This is the part of my post where I ask for donations to the Bring Back My Humps campaign…any takers?
Hi, my name is Kari and I want to be a part of a dance off.
I believe what sparked my love for the dance off was when I witnessed Julia Stiles dominate in “Save the Last Dance.” This is long overdue, but must be said…Thank you Julia for giving me the confidence to back that ass up.
Whether it be at a bar, in the middle of the street or any flat surface, I want to be involved and I bet you do too. Below are some of my favise dance offs.
Leave it to the Wayans brothers to pull off an amazing dance off scene. “White Chicks” stars the brothers as two FBI agents who impersonate ladies in order to solve a case. You’re probably thinking how ridiculous that sounds…but I pinky swear…this movie is hil.ar.ious.
P.S. keep an eye out for Busy Philipps and Jennifer Carpenter.
If you didn’t think the Wayans brothers were going to win…slap yourself in the face.
‘Lose My Breath’ – Destiny’s Child
It’s classy Beyoncé vs. gangster Beyoncé. First of all, can there even be a winner in this scenario? Second of all, why are you still reading this and not watching the video?
When I dream about dance offs, this is exactly how I picture them. In the Destiny’s Child scenario, I would probably take on the role of Michelle. I already rock a white jumpsuit every Thursday…gotta be on point for my ethics class. You dig it?
Britney Spears vs. Austin Powers
It’s Britney Spears!
While many harass and harangue Britney for her singing abilities…you can’t take away the fact that this bitch can dance and look good while doing it.
Sadly, this round goes to Austin. I do have one question though…how do I get bullets to shoot out of my breasts?
J.Lo vs. Tom Cruise
He is really making Katie Holmes proud with this one. Even though I do not endorse Tom Cruise at all…he does have some appeal when he embodies Les Grossman.
I deem J.Lo the winner…she is from da Bronx after all.
Catch you on the flip side.
We are a few hours away from Grammy time…let me share my last predictions before showtime.
- Best Pop Vocal Album/Song of the Year/Album of the Year/Record of the Year
Let’s get the obvious awards out of the way. And the winner is:
- Oh and another reason to watch the awards tonight…Adele is performing live. It’s a big deal because she just had surgery on her vocal pipes.
- Best New Artist
- The Band Perry
- Bon Iver
- J. Cole
- Nicki Minaj
While I assume the masses will want Nicki Minaj to receive this honor, I think the Grammys will throw us a curve ball and choose a lesser known artist. I will let you in on a secret…for this category I closed my eyes and randomly picked. And the winner is…Skrillex.
After Googling this person…I’m not so sure about this pick so I am going to just take the punch and move on.
- Best R&B Album
- “F.A.M.E.” – Chris Brown
- “Second Chance” – El DeBarge
- “Love Letter” – R. Kelly
- “Pieces of Me” – Ledisi
- “Kelly” – Kelly Price
ANYONE BUT CHRIS BROWN! You guessed it…still not over it. I’m going to vote for El DeBarge. He looks like he’s got some spunk and he’s been arrested…winner!
The 54th annual Grammy awards will begin at 8 p.m. EST on CBS. Don’t miss out…Kelly Clarkson will be performing.
A note to my fans: For every correct guess please send me a key lime pie. For every wrong guess…one of my roommates will punch me.
Don’t worry I’m not listing every category…I don’t want to be here all night. For the full list of nominees…click here!
Best Comedy Album
- “Alpocalypse” – “Weird Al” Yankovic
- “Finest Hour” – Patton Oswalt
- “Hilarious” – Louis C.K.
- “Kathy Griffin: 50 & Not Pregnant” – Kathy Griffin
- “Turtleneck & Chain” – The Lonely Island
In my personal opinion, I think this award is really between Kathy and The Lonely Island. While I think The Lonely Island will win, I’m really hoping for Kathy to take home Grammy gold. I mean she has been nominated every year since 2008 and hasn’t won! That bitch has actively campaigned for this award…let’s give her one!
- Best Country Solo Performance
- “Dirt Road Anthem” – Jason Aldean
- “I’m Gonna Love You Through It” – Martina McBride
- “Honey Bee” – Blake Shelton
- “Mean” – Taylor Swift
- “Mama’s Song” – Carrie Underwood
As many of you know, I dislike country music. But apparently other people like it so I guess I have to discuss it. First off, I will never ever endorse Taylor Swift. So I’m choosing Jason Aldean to win because he did duet with Kelly Clarkson and he looked good doing it.
- Best Rap Album
- “Watch the Throne” – Jay-Z & Kanye West
- “Tha Carter IV” – Lil Wayne
- “Lasers” – Lupe Fiasco
- “Pink Friday” – Nicki Minaj
- “My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy” – Kanye West
No question here…”Watch the Throne” will win. If I am incorrect, the Grammy’s will lose all the credibility it has built up over the past 54 years.
Stay tuned for some more predictions!
Sometimes I stumble upon a great/horrendous/hilarious photo that evokes various emotional responses such as: sobbing, LOLing, smiley face, mean face or sad face.
The photo I chose today was in response to the sweet rapper – Snoop Dog – I’m going to see in the flesh this Saturday evening:
I have a few things to say:
1. Where do I get a mesh basketball jersey?
2. Why is Britney Spears (spiritual goddess) hanging out with Snoop? Are they drinking gin and juice after their bball game? If so, why wasn’t I invited?
3. Does Britney only have one hoop earring in?
4. Who is that handsome young gentleman in the back? I shall call him…dimples.