If I was Ever Stranded in the Jungle…

I would want it to play out just like Katy Perry’s new music video for “Roar.” Haven’t seen it yet? Thank goodness I’m here to share it with you.

While watching this music video, I thought how great I would look in a leopard top, a skirt made out of leaves and a leather strap wrapped around my arm to show off my guns. I know I would look so good that I’m even considering wearing that exact ensemble for Causal Friday.

At first, I thought this music video was a little redic. After watching it three and a half times, I realized that Katy always gives us ladies such positive anthems (Remember “Firework” and “Part of Me“). Because of her lady anthems, it’s hard not to love her imitation of a tiger roaring loudly.

There are a few highlights to Katy’s new music video that I would like to share with you:

  • Katy teaches us how to make a spear with a high heel and a stick
  • She trains an elephant to be a portable shower…snaps for Katy
  • She also assists an alligator practice good hygiene by brushing his teeth
  • Katy enjoys taking selfies with a monkey. It’s amazing that Katy’s cell still works in the jungle. She must have a solar-powered charger.

Those are just a few of my favorite moments in the four-minute video. If you don’t have time to watch, I’ll tell you the ending…Katy becomes queen of the jungle. Get it girl.

P.S. Katy – Can you tell me how you hair looks so damn good in that jungle heat? Give a girl some tips!

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Singles Dropping Left and Right

Photo Courtesy: www.popdust.com

Photo Courtesy: http://www.popdust.com

I’m sure you’ve heard, but two pop ladies released some new jams today. Katy Perry released “Roar” and Lady Gaga released “Applause.”

I have to say, I’m not super impressed with either of them…I’ve heard better from these two. When I really started thinking about how I’m not in love with either of these songs, a scary thought entered my mind…am I too old for pop music?!!? Dear God, I hope not. What will I listen to? And don’t you dare say country music.

You take a listen to both songs and let me know your thoughts. First up is “Roar” by Katy Perry.

Next up, Lady Gaga’s “Applause.”

Let’s be real, once these songs hit the radio and I hear them approximately sixty times within the next three months, they will get stuck in my head and I’ll be changing my negative tune.

That literally happened to me with Miley’s new song, “We Can’t Stop,” about four hours ago. When I first heard “We Can’t Stop,” all I felt was longing for the “Can’t Be Tamed” days. Now, I’m into the new Cyrus single and I’m wondering how long it will take me to twerk like that.

Honestly, is “Roar” and “Applause” as good as “E.T.” and “Bad Romance” were? Because they were God damn great! As Hilary Duff once said, “let’s go back, back to the beginning” and bring back those cool jams!

Topless Tuesday

Yes. It is time for everyone’s favorite day of the week. It’s Topless Tuesday!

Anderson Davis

Don’t recognize the name? Don’t worry, I didn’t either. But this man goes by another name…”The Zesty Guy.” Yes, you’ve all seen the Kraft commercials and print ads advertising the Zesty Italian dressing and my goodness…what great ads they are.

The Zesty Guy has a real name and it’s Anderson Davis. Anderson was born and raised in Northern California and has a love for sports. His love for sports led him to a deal with the Tampa Bay Devil Rays…that’s a baseball team btw. Sadly, Anderson’s baseball dreams were cut short because of an injury. Honestly, I’m glad they did, because look at what gift God has given us!

Anderson has had other jobs besides embodying Kraft’s Italian Dressing. He has appeared on some soaps, CSI and models. I did find out that he appeared in a Katy Perry music video! Anderson plays the other dude that Katy Perry doesn’t love because she still loves her previous boyfriend that died in the war. Get it, Katy.

Anywho, Anderson has caused some controversy with his zesty ads. A Christian group is outraged because he is shirtless and almost in his full birthday suit in the ads. What’s the big deal? I’ve seen racier.

If you want to get in contact with the Zesty Guy…he has a Twitter! Check him out @TheZestyGuy. You can also create a ZestyGram. It’s basically a personalized Ecard to send to your friends. I know what I’ll be doing tomorrow!

Anderson, thank you and stay zesty.

Non-Demeaning to Women Wednesday

Katy Perry has officially released her video for “Part of Me.” While I’m still on the fence about whether or not I love the video interpretation of the song, I can’t deny that it’s empowering to women.

Katy – After seeing this video, I’m pretty sure no one will mess with you…ever.

I’m on a boat…with a celebrity and a life vest…part II

It’s time to strap on your life vest once again…I’m about to reveal the second celebrity that I would like to accompany me on a cruise.

Katy Perry

Photo Courtesy: thesun.co.uk

There is one thing I know about Katy Perry…she loves a good theme and always dresses for the occasion. Show of hands…who would like to see a week’s worth of Katy’s sailor attire? I know I do.

The list of people who don’t like Katy Perry is very small. I think the reason for that is she’s always full of pep, has a positive attitude and likes to party.

Even going through a divorce, she was still smiling. No really, Katy added a smiley face next to her signature on the divorce papers. o0o0o burn.

The Part of Me” singer must have learned the oh-so-important lesson brought to you by Xtina Aguilera…when it comes to men, they can’t hold us down.

Anywho, I picture Katy bopping around the cruise deck meeting and greeting fans during the day and performing her mega-hits at night.

I recently read that Katy is finally collaborating with her bff Rihana. Hopefully Rihanna can helicopter in and perform with Katy while we are cruising the ocean blue. If not, I’m sure Snoop Dog will be on board to sing his notable verse in “California Gurls“…he can’t be that busy.

Or if we are really lucky, Kanye “I’mma let you finish” West will swim out to the boat in order to perform his verse in “E.T.

Hey, a girl can dream. See you on board!

Let’s Recap the Grammys

Okay, I was wrong about a few of the winners, but I was right about Adele! Hopefully these correct predictions will earn me some street cred. Anywho, here are my most memorable/WTF moments of the 54th annual Grammy awards.

5. Nicki Minaj’s ensemble

Photo Courtesy: glamour.com

While I always appreciate a good religious tribute…and by religious tribute, I mean something similar to “Like a Prayer,” However, I was a little confused as to what Minaj was trying to do. Was this even Nicki or was it her alter-ego Roman?

Minaj called into Ryan Seacrest’s radio show today to explain. “Well, [that religious character I walked the carpet with] is a major part of the story and the movie that I’m writing about one of my alter egos; his name is Roman,” she said.

“Basically, the religious figure is there because he was called on by Roman’s mom [Martha] to rehabilitate him.”

I have a few questions. Was that a real bishop? If so, when will the church be excommunicating him? Can I have an alter ego and commit crimes? Will my alter ego go to jail or will we both go?

If you missed Minaj’s performance, check it out here!

4. Chris Brown continues to ruin lives

Photo Courtesy: billboard.com

I’m not happy about this one bit. Who approved not one, but two musical numbers staring the spokesperson for domestic violence Chris Brown?

Along with that, who voted in favor of the spokesperson for domestic violence Chris Brown getting the Grammy for Best R & B album?

This was probably the worst part of the Grammys. I wish Jay-Z was there to beat his ass. No one hurts Rihanna…she’s a national treasure!

3. Katy Perry does a solid for the bitter ladies

Photo Courtesy: peoplestylewatch.com

As we all know, Katy Perry is going through a divorce. Since us ladies have to stick together, I support Katy in whatever she does…even the blue hair ugh.

Anywho, Katy performed “E.T.” and a new jam titled “Part of Me” while wearing a futuristic latex jumpsuit. Many are saying that “Part of Me” is a huge dig at her ex, Russell Brand.

Here are some lyrics that can help you decide:

“So you can keep the diamond ring/It don’t mean nothing anyway/In fact you can keep everything yeah yeah/Except for me”

Two things: I think Kelly Clarkson may have some competition and o0o0o0oo burn!

2. J Hud’s tribute to Whitney Houston

Photo Courtesy: nme.com

At first I was hoping for Mariah, Beyonce or even Xtina to be tasked with singing the Whitney Houston tribute.

When I found out it was Jennifer Hudson, I was less than pumped. But I stand corrected. After watching the performance, I was pleasantly surprised at how well J Hud did.

So I must say something…Dear J Hud, I’m sorry for doubting you. Love, Kari.

I thought the performance was simple and classy…just they way it should have been. I also have to give it up to J Hud for preparing so quickly.

1. Adele

Photo Courtesy: nme.com

Obviously the leading lady of the evening was the “Rolling in the Deep” singer. She swept the Grammys winning a total of six awards and delivered an outstanding performance. How pissed do you think her ex-boyfriend is?

Entertainers I want to sing my wedding song…part III

Katy Perry – ‘Teenage Dream’

Photo Courtesy: justjared.buzznet.com

When Katy Perry opens her mouth…gold comes out. “Teenage Dream” peaked at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100, Pop Songs, Adult Pop Songs and Hot Dance Club Songs. See, I don’t lie.

Besides being an unforgettable affair, having Katy at my wedding would give me the right to say, “Remember when Katy Perry entertained at my wedding?” I would make it a point to utter that statement every single day.

I chose “Teenage Dream” because it gives us single ladies hope that you can love a dude forever. I mean look at Brad and Jennifer…everyone thought that was forever…thanks for putting us through hell, Angelina.

This jam also really shed light on the skintight jeans and how I need to get my ass on the treadmill and into a pair of these pants.

Favise lyrics: “Now every February/You’ll be my Valentine, Valentine.”

Watch the music video…if I ever saw the man that stars alongside Katy walking on the street, I’d probably walk into a parking meter or into traffic.

Is this real life?

Happy Monday! I thought I would start off the week by sharing some tunes from the past. I have a few other jams that I want to share with you and didn’t want to overwhelm, so I will be continuing this post later on!  Okay, let’s do this.

There are tons and tons of people who try to break into the music industry and it could end up taking years before they finally get noticed. A pertinent example: Katy Perry, she signed with four labels before “I Kissed a Girl” floated to our ears. While some of these aspiring musicians 100% deserve a record deal, there are some that should try another career path…please.

Brooke Hogan – “About Us”

Photo Courtesy: music.ign.com

For some strange reason, I was reminded of Brooke Hogan’s single “About Us” that the wanna be singer released in 2006. Hulk Hogan must have really put a lot of people in headlocks because this song featured Paul Wall. Maybe this jam is the reason that Lil’ Weezy didn’t sign the Houston rapper to Young Money Records…just a thought.

Now I won’t lie to you, I know the chorus by heart and if this song came on at the bar, I would be on that dance floor in the blink of an eye. I love this song because it’s so catchy and Brooke is rockin’ the shades with bedazzled lenses way before Snooki ever put them on (yes, I just took Snooki’s name in vain). Some highlights from the music video:

  • Brooke is singing with a grill in her mouth. That is some serious skill…remember when grills were cool?
  • Boxer by day, dancer by night….end of the video cumulates with a DANCE OFF! Side note: I’m still trying to convince my friends to learn a choreographed dance that we can bust out at the club. Since that isn’t going as well as planned, I am in the process of taking applications!
  • Not only does Brooke win the DANCE OFF! Brooke gets to take Paul Wall home…jealous.

Favises lyrics:

“I’m just trying to live but your all up in my grill/How’s a girl to breathe with all the media starring down my mouth/With a four inch lens I just wanna hit the mall with some of my friends” (Don’t we all want to just go to the mall, Brooke?)

Even though “About Us” peaked at #33 on the Billboard Hot 100, not everyone who has heard this song feels the same as me. Her music career sorta floundered and now I haven’t heard anything from Brooke that doesn’t involve her parent’s divorce or her mom’s creepy cougar ways.

Brooke – In the words of Mean Girl’s Kevin G …Don’t let the hataz stop you from doin’ ya thang!

“Last Friday Night”

Katy Perry, you really are a teenage dream

Special Alert: I’m only focusing this post on Katy Perry. Yes, she did something really great.

If you haven’t heard or seen by now, hopefully you are ok and not in the hospital because Katy Perry released her new eight minute music video for “Last Friday Night.” It’s floating all over the Internet and even on some of the entertainment shows. As discussed previously, Katy embodies Kathy Beth Terry, a full-on nerd. She creates a hil.ar.ious scene of an at first boring Friday night that turns into a blast.

Thanks to a makeover courtesy of Rebecca Black, Kathy goes from geek to sleek. She makes all of us nerds at heart proud when she bags the hot guy in the grade above her! Go Kathy!

Kathy’s Uncle Kenny makes an appearance playing the sax. Uncle Kenny is really famed saxophone player Kenny G. And for all of us old pop fans, Hanson makes a cameo, among many more.

This is one video you cannot miss!  Look out for my favorite Kathy quote “Oh my God he’s so hottttt.”

Celebrity Top 3

Here we go kids!

Alec Baldwin running for NYC mayor…yessssssssssssss!

Photo Courtesy gopusa.com

Rumor has it that “30 Rock” star Alec Baldwin wants to run for New York City mayor in 2013. Quoted in The Hollywood Reporter,”
Baldwin’s rep commented, “I wouldn’t rule it out.”

Baldwin, who is a registered Democrat, has begun to consider the coveted position after the Anthony Weiner scandal erupted. The Twitpic master, once a shoe-in for the position may not run after he admitted that it was him in the photos. And, oh yea, the multiple women.

I believe that if Baldwin runs, he’ll cruise happily into the political scene. I believe it’s that Baldwin charm…

Meet Kathy Beth Terry

Photo Courtesy gweenkent.blogspot.com

In anticipation oh her new music video for “Last Friday Night,” Katy Perry has revealed another side to her that we would have never guessed. Meet Kathy Beth Terry, who is an 8th grade nerd who loves Sudoku puzzles and Steve Johnson, a 9th grader who hasn’t noticed Kathy yet.

Kathy Beth Terry has been releasing short YouTube videos that explain who she is and what she’s all about. My personal favorite is Kathy’s tour of her bedroom. Btw Kathy’s neighbor is Rebecca Black who is the famed singer of the smash hit “Friday.” Stay tuned to Miss Perry’s Facebook page for more updates on Kathy.

Don’t worry Kanye…she’s not a gold digger

Photo Courtesy babble.com

You may need to sit down for this one. Apparently Kanye West was spotted with the one, the only Mary-Kate Olsen! I’ll give this a few minutes to sink in.

The pair was spotted getting close at the Submercer Nightclub in NYC, which happened to be the same night of Kanye’s 35th birthday. The details on the hookup are slim, here’s hoping that more tidbits arise soon. I would love to see these two hit the red carpet together.

The Olsen twins are on fire these days, Ashley was recently spotted with Justin Timberlake. One word of advice Mary-Kate…be careful. I don’t want to hear any demeaning words about you in a rap song.


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