The World’s Most Beautiful Woman is…

Photo Courtesy: people.com

I was about 87% sure it was going to be me this time around. Well I guess there’s always next year…

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Did you know…

Beyoncé has two halos?

Photo Courtesy: inquisitr.com

My roommates and I are big fans of music video countdowns and since MTV has forgotten it’s a music channel, the Fuse network has taken its place in our hearts.

Even though I have previously posted about “Halo,” I was educated last night by the lady on Fuse and now feel compelled to share my new knowledge with you.

Side note: While Kanye thinks that Beyoncé’s best video of all time was “Single Ladies,” I’m going to have to disagree and go with “Halo.”

Anywho, last night, while watching the 20 sexiest videos by singer/actress Beyoncé, I learned that there was an alternative music video for “Halo.” Next thing I knew I was experiencing whiplash over the fact that I didn’t know this. To my surprise, the info was legit.

Now for my comments on the piece.

As usual Lady B looks fierce and the gentleman in the video is on point.

I actually like this version more than I like the official version. I just wish I knew why Beyoncé’s man was being chased and killed by a dog. Along with that, why was money thrown across the forest ground? I’m thinking there was some mob action involved.

In the end, it doesn’t matter what Beyoncé did or didn’t do in the musical video version of “Halo.” She could have sat in a dark room and mouthed the words for all I cared…I would never shut Beyoncé out.

P.S. stay tuned for Topless Tuesday!


The Second Coming Has Arrived

Photo Courtesy: gossiponthis.com

Typically I am okay with the fact that some people aren’t as diligent as I am in terms of celebrity gossip/news. But if you were unaware that the most anticipated birth since (I’m going to say it) Suri Cruise happened this past Saturday…you should be ashamed of yourself!

The top story since late Saturday evening has been the arrival of Ivy Blue Carter or Blue Ivy Carter. From the massive amount of creeping I have done on the interweb, no one has confirmed the name 100%. E! News is on Team Blue Ivy while Perez Hilton is on Team Ivy Blue. Personally, my pick is Ivy Blue, but I’m excited either way.

Photo Courtesy: scrapetv.com

I have been waiting for this birth for quite sometime. I remember back in 2010, there was a legitimate rumor going around that Queen B was with child. That year I was working a full-time job…shocking, right? Hearing this news, I proceeded to pack up my desk and said the following to my wonderful boss:

Kari: “I have to go home early today.”

Boss: “Is everything okay?”

Kari: “Yes, Beyoncé is pregnant and I need to go to home to prepare.”

Needless to say, I was not allowed to leave the office early that day.

Flash-forward from 2010 to Aug. 28, 2011 at the MTV Music Awards…my dreams came true. Beyoncé officially revealed that she was pregnant during her performance of “Love on Top.” It was a beautiful thing.

Photo Courtesy: ciciworldnewspost.com

It’s being reported that Mr. and Mrs. Hova spent $1.3 million on renting out the entire baby floor at the Lenox Hill Hospital in New York so Queen B could deliver her baby in private. Let me tell you, my mom chartered the same amount of security for my birth…it comes with the territory.

Checking in under the name Ingrid Jackson, Beyoncé and Jay-Z required that tape being placed over hospital security cameras and all employees turn in their cell phones to ensure no pictures would be leaked.

Since the power couple is super private, I don’t see them releasing pictures or news about the birth anytime soon. Therefore, I will share with you the one thing I am praying happened during this magical moment…Ivy Blue (or Blue Ivy) came out with the HOVA sign up.

Congrats to Beyoncé and Jay-Z! P.S. I have never babysat a small baby before, but I have taken care to two cats at once. That makes me qualified I’m sure!

Side note: Perez has flip-flopped to Blue Ivy.


Stuck in my head – ‘Talk That Talk’

Photo Courtesy: prettymuchamazing.com

Rihanna released her sixth studio album “Talk That Talk” Nov. 21, 2011. Let me tell you…I was pumped.

When Rihanna releases an album, she typically talks about the important things in life. For example, Umbrellas, S&M and the dangerous game of Russian Roulette…all important factors in my life, as they should be in yours. Needless to say, I was looking forward to the wisdom of her sixth CD.

The first track released off this album was “We Found Love” = superb choice. While the song is upbeat, the lyrics tell a different and sad story. As for the music video, it showed the masses that RiRi is still in pain. I feel bad for the Chris Brown look-a-like…do you think he gets heckled on the street?

Photo Courtesy: eonline.com

Side note: I’ll see you in hell Chris Brown!

When the album was released, I like to chose the songs that should be released as singles. I was seriously campaigning for “Talk that Talk” ft. Hova and was slightly disappointed when I heard “You Da One” playing on the radio a few days ago. Sad face.

After going through a period of denial, depression and recovery, I’ve have accepted “You Da One” as the second single, but realized that I don’t have to like it.

My goal with this post is to start an Internet movement/revolution in order to get “Talk that Talk” ft. Hova as the third single off RiRi’s album.

Here are some reasons why:

  1. It features Mr. Hova
  2. You can play this song extremely loud in your Honda and look like a boss
  3. Rihanna taught me how to count from 1 to 4…thanks boo
  4. Jay-Z says the word “pee”
  5. Rihanna chants at the end…and who doesn’t love a good chant

Favise Lyrics: “I’mma get it right on the first try for you” (As do I Rihanna, as do I ).

Rihanna – I know once you read this, you will be convinced to release “Talk That Talk” as your third single. All I ask in return is to be featured in the music video. I’ve been working on my Pop, Lock and Drop It and I think I’ve finally hit the nail on the head. See you on set girl!


Stuck in my head…‘Halo’

Photo Courtesy: blog.kazaa.com

The year was 2009 and it was one of the best years of my life so far. While there are a multitude of reasons that this time period was fucking awesome, I am only legally allowed to reveal a few:

  • I was FINALLY of age to enter a bar without the threat of being kicked out
  • It was my senior year in college…and I graduated on time…point Kari
  • Spring Break ’09…details to follow in my highly anticipated book
  • Beyoncé released  “Halo”

A track on her third studio album, “I Am…Sasha Fierce,” Beyoncé really hit the nail on the head with this song. Every time I listen to this jam I just want to sway back and forth and pretend Jay-Z is my husband.

As usual, Beyoncé ran right up to the top of the Billboard Hot 100. “Halo” debuted at number 93 and scooted up to number five…Yeaaa B.

Favises lyrics: “Remember those walls I built/Well, baby they’re tumbling down”

Whenever I hear “Halo,” there is one particular moment that I always flash back to. It was the mid-morning of May 2, 2009…the day my world stopped and I graduated from college. From 11:03 a.m. until 2:56 p.m., I played “Halo” on repeat and cried in my bedroom. This is when I realized the party was over and I was about to crash into real world. So I would like to thank Beyoncé for getting me through that rough time and making me feel pretty.

As for the music video, Sasha is Fierce…I wish I could wear a black leotard, tights and heels as an outfit…don’t we all? Also, do you think B and Jay sit in a chair and stare at each other?

I’ve made a decision…decision made… “Halo” is in the lead to be my wedding song. That is, unless B. Spears covers it.


Another reason why I need to start wearing a blazer sans shirt

Thank you Beyonce.


Celebs who would match on Match.com

I keep seeing these Match.com commercials which state that “1 in every 5 relationships begin online.” These days, online dating is becoming the norm…one reason why…we are busier than ever. This got me thinking that since celebrities are some of the busiest people, they might benefit from hopping online to find a date or whatever they’re into. I’ve decided to compose a post on which celebs would match up on Match.com.

Rihanna & Drake

Photo Courtesy: popcrush.com

As we all know, Beyoncé and Jay-Z currently hold the crown as royal couple of the hip-hop/R&B genres. Rihanna and Drake will have to settle for the princess and prince spot …for now.

These two are meant to be and they are slapping us in the face with their love every time they are within 10 feet of each other. If you’ve ever watched Rihanna’s video for “What’s My Name?” it’s like watching a newlywed couple…equally gross and cute…for us single ladies…more gross than cute.

While these two briefly dated last year, they decided to hold off because of that dumbass Rihanna previously dated (still haven’t forgotten Chris Brown). Rihanna also tried to date that sports guy, but he obviously wasn’t on her level. Hint, hint Rihanna…read the writings on the wall…they say DRAKE!

A few months ago, I heard these two lovebirds were spotted making out in Montreal – Drake is from Canada after all. Hopefully he took RiRi to meet the parents and got this ball rolling. Following the Montreal incident, it was reported that these two want to focus on their careers or want to date around or not in a place to commit…what I’m really hearing is blah, blah, blah. Stop beating around the bush and get it together!

First date location: an exotic island where Rihanna and Drake can get there grove on without the cameras.

Rihanna – I think Drake can go downtown with a girl exactly like you…he will make you feel like the only girl in the world.

Don’t fret – I’ll add more couples who would match up on Match.com throughout the day.


VMA Moments – The Awkward – The Funny – The Worst – The Favises

I heard somewhere that it is an unwritten rule that you have to write about the VMAs the day after it airs. I understand, accept this and feel the need to share my thoughts about this year’s event.

Okay, was it just me or did MTV sort of slack off this year? I remember the days where I wouldn’t look away from the television! This year I got random shots of people in their chairs, that poor girl with the crutch looking around and much more. Maybe it was the whole let’s not pay someone to host, but have a guy who acts like a host but not get the credit for it thing. Past hosts including, Chelsea Handler, Russell Brand, and even Diddy made the show more enjoyable! Last night, I was just confused and upset that Lady Gaga was all over the place dressed like a man. I get it, but doesn’t mean I’m not a little mad at her for ruining the Britney tribute. Yea, I said it.

The Awkward

Photo Courtesy: celebrity-gossip.net

When Justin Bieber brought a snake (who is conveniently named Johnson) to the VMAs and tried to sneak that awkward innuendo past us during the pre-show!

Of course MTV had Biebs gf, Selena Gomez interview him. When Gomez asked him to talk about his outfit, Bieber said, “I have a snake. I have red pants. And I have cheetah shoes.” And what is the snake’s name, asked Selena? Bieber grossly says, “My snake’s name is Johnson.”

Ok Biebs – some of us are actually old enough to know what you are hinting at. I hope someone gave you that birds and the bees talk…if not, there will be a big surprise waiting for you in 9 months.

The Funny

Photo Courtesy: hollywoodbest.info

When the House band singer, Jessie J sang the TLC classic “No Scrubs” after Chris Brown’s performance. Let’s start off with discussing Jessie J. Bless this girls heart, she broke her foot after falling off stage 11 weeks ago and still hoofed it to the VMAs.

Really though, who would cancel that gig? With her bedazzled cast and crutches she did a pretty good job, even though she couldn’t stand up that often. Kudos!

So back to the woman beater, I told you before I would never forget what he did. Brown performed some songs, I honestly couldn’t tell you which ones or spend the time looking them up.

During his performance, I was hoping that a fan or even Jay-Z would throw a shoe at him. Sadly, that didn’t happen. But Jessie J got the last laugh when Brown exited the stage and she broke out into a rendition of “No Scrubs.” Thank you Jessie J, thank you.

The Worst

Photo Courtesy: crixfix.com

Ever since the tribute to Britney was announced, I have lost sleep over the anticipation of finally seeing a dream of mine come true. I was rudely lied to by a few media outlets when they stated the news that Janet Jackson, Madonna, Ke$ha, Katy Perry, among many others would be singing the Britney classics we all know and love. Well Britney, we certainly didn’t get that.

To honor Britney, Lady Gaga came out still dressed as Jo Calderone. She said some wonderfully true things about B. Spears: “She taught us all how to be fearless, and the industry wouldn’t be the same without her.” But of course, she also had to say some weirdly awkward things about B. Spears. Remember when Lady Gaga said she used to hang pictures on of Britney on her wall and proceeded to “touch herself?” I think she should have stuck with saying the nice things.

After the all-dance tribute to Spears was complete, Lady Gaga did one thing right by announcing, “Everyone get the f*ck up!” Britney strutted up to the stage to receive her award and almost engaged in another intimate moment with a lady on the VMAs. Spears abruptly pulled away from Gaga and stated, “No, I’ve done that already.” Remember that time she made out with Madonna on stage and no one saw Xtina do it because they had to get Justin’s reaction? (It’s Britney Bitch!)

Anywho, because of Lady Gaga, I felt that Britney didn’t get a chance to really express her feelings about the Video Vanguard Award. Not that she says much these days, but it still would have been nice to give her a moment.

Hey Britney – an even bigger dream come true would be to meet you! Call me!

The Favises

Duh! It’s all about Beyoncé and that baby bump! At the end of her performance of “Love on Top,” she dropped the mic, unbuttoned her jacket and showed the world her baby bump. The smile on Jay-Z’s face was epic. It will be nice to have a Lil Hova running around, don’t you think?

Photo Courtesy: music-mix.ew.com


Hey! Where was my invite?

With the upcoming Kardashian-Humphries nuptials on the horizon, it got me thinking about all the celebrity wedding invitations that were apparently lost in the mail. Here is my list of invitations that I wish the postal service didn’t lose (because I’m 100% sure I was invited).

Khloe Kardashian & Lamar Odom

Photo Courtesy: people.com

September 27th has become a national holiday in my home. It is the day that my favises Kardashian sister got hitched (whoop, whoop) after only a month of dating! Dreams do come true. The world thought that Kim was going to be the first to get married and we all know how badly she wanted some man, any man to put a ring on it.

While it wasn’t looking good for Kim, the spotlight fell on older sis Kourtney. From what we have seen on “Keeping Up with the Kardashians,” I sure hope Kourtney doesn’t tie that knot. I will even go as far as hoofing it to the nearest church and lighting a candle for her. So the point goes to Khloe! Since E! documents every sneeze that the K-Dash sisters emit, we had to expect a Khloe & Lamar wedding special…a 2-hour special as a matter of fact.

Why I’m angry my invite was lost in the mail:

  • All of the Kardashians were in the same area – including Rob. <3
  • A bunch of other celebs were in attendance, including Chelsea Handler, Kobe Bryant and Kelly Osbourne. I could have done some serious networking.
  • There was a Hollywood nightclub-theme reception that Babyface sang at!

Mr. & Mrs. Hova

Photo Courtesy: examiner.com

April 4, 2008 – the union to end all unions occurred. After 6 years of being bf & gf, Jay-Z liked it and finally put a ring on it! With about 40 guests in attendance, this was one event that I wish I knew about. I only needed a two hour notice, the ceremony was a stones throw away in New York!

I should have seen the clues. The day of the wedding there was a tent erected on the roof of Jay-Z’s penthouse, around 60,000 orchid blooms were delivered and DJ Cassidy even spilled some of the beans. According to People.com, “Cassidy mentioned a week ago that he was really excited for Jay Z and Beyoncé’s wedding party to happen, said another source.” Dammit.

Why I’m angry my invite was lost in the mail:

  • All three Destiny’s Child members were in attendance. I bet they sang “Independent Women Part I.” Side note, I’m still waiting for my acceptance letter to Charlie’s Angels Boot Camp.
  • I could have made the Hova symbol all evening without being judged or kicked out.
  • It’s always a wonderful site when Jay-Z straps on a tux.

Britney Spears & Jason Alexander

Photo Courtesy: idolator.com

Let’s be real, I had to include it! While I felt that many believed that this was the start of her downward spiral, I will have to disagree. I am convinced the spiral began when B. Spears and he who shall not be named broke up (hint…lead singer of boy band ‘N Sync). But that is neither here, nor there.

Anywho, January 3, 2004 the Little White Wedding Chapel on the Vegas Strip received a gift from above. Britney Spears and childhood friend, Jason Alexander busted in and got hitched. Don’t worry, the newlyweds scooped up a marriage license at the Clark County Marriage Bureau for $55.

Dear Jamie Spears, since you weren’t available to walk Brit down the aisle, a hotel bellman hopped in your place. No big deal. Britney’s wedding attire included a classy baseball hat, belly shirt and jeans. After the ceremony, a night full of sin ensued. Sadly, 55 hours later the marriage was annulled…boo.

Why I’m angry my invite was lost in the mail:

  • Who in their right mind wouldn’t want to have witnessed this?
  • The wedding cost a grand total of $200, which included photos, a bouquet and video. That’s a steal compared the what K-Fed cost her.
  • The marriage took place at 5:30 a.m. That’s the best part of a night on the town!

Britney – I would have given my left arm to have been present at this wedding. Next time, call me girl. I know you have my digits, I’ve sent them to you a handful of times.


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