What About Cher?!

Cher-Portrait_s640x427

As much as I hate to admit it, I am officially over the 25 year hump on this journey we call life. In regards to my musical heroes, I grew up with Britney, Xtina and even a splash of Mandy Moore (Remember her?!).

Anywho, pretty much every time a lady singer of the early 2000s won an MTV Award, Teen Choice Award or were just being interviewed by that old guy from MTV News, they always said Madonna is “my hero” or “my inspiration” or whatever. Now, don’t get me wrong, I think Madonna has done some groundbreaking things – for example the “Like A Prayer” music video and the cone bra…but what about Cher!?

I will preface the rest of this article by saying I’m extremely partial to Cher. Cher is my mom’s Britney Spears – her spiritual goddess. I’ve been listening to her music since my time in the womb. Therefore, I want to share some of Cher’s greatest moments because she deserves some God damn recognition!

3. She’s a Pillar of Women’s Rights

Cher has many, many songs that empower women to leave those loser men behind and be stronger than yesterday…get it? Cher’s latest pro-lady power song that I’d like to mention is titled “Women’s World.”

Here, Cher tells me that This is a woman’s world / This is a woman’s world / Tell the truth / This is a woman’s world / Tell the truth / This is a woman’s world. And I think we’ve found Hilary Clinton’s campaign theme song.

2. She Can Wear Next to Nothing on a Battleship and #killit

If you are a Cher fan…you know what I’m referring to. Let’s go back…back to 1989 when Cher released the song “If I Could Turn Back Time.” The music video took place on the battleship USS Missouri where Cher was romping around singing to a ton of sailors – how patriotic of her.

Believe it or not, this music video caused a lot of controversy because of Cher’s outfit. She was wearing such little clothing that this video was even banned by MTV! What was this scandalous outfit? Well, it was basically some leather scraps and tights. I would also like to mention that Cher was 43 at the time. This music video is another reason why Cher should be appreciated more.

1. She Can Do it All

Cher is a woman of many talents. Let’s delve deeper into her accomplishments:

Cher…

  • Has an Oscar for her role in Moonstruck
  • Pioneered the use of auto tune – without Cher, T-Pain would not exist
  • Won an Emmy, a Grammy, and three Golden Globes
  • Is a professional cougar…Cher has dated Tom Cruise, Val Kilmer,Richie Sambora and Rob Camilletti aka Bagel Boy
  • Tweets amazing things, such as:

Screen shot 2014-07-30 at 10.26.22 PM Screen shot 2014-07-30 at 10.23.14 PM

Screen shot 2014-07-30 at 10.21.49 PM

As you can see, there are so many reasons to thank Cher. Personally, she has paved the way for me to be able to wear a leather jacket over my see through bodysuit. With that being said, I would like to thank Cher for being a HBIC, an inspiration and one cool ass lady!

 

About these ads

A Love Letter to Joe Biden

Photo Courtesy: www.wbobradio.com

Photo Courtesy: http://www.wbobradio.com

If you know me at all, you know I’ve had a crush on VP Joe Biden for many years. If you don’t know me, you’re probably thinking “How old is this chick?” Well, a lady never reveals her age, but I will say that there is about 45 years between us.

Anywho, this post is not about politics, it’s about the real Joe Biden…the man behind that winning smile and classy wink. Throughout the course of his Vice Presidency, Joe has done some great things that made me fall deeply for him. I’d like to share them with you, but don’t go falling for him…I already have Jill Biden to compete with and clearly Jill is winning.

1. He’s From Scranton, Pennsylvania (and isn’t afraid to talk about it)

Photo Courtesy: www.zazzle.com

Photo Courtesy: http://www.zazzle.com

Along with Mr. Biden, I was also born and raised in Scranton, PA. Most people only vaguely know the area from the TV show The Office, but there is so much more to Scranton that meets the eye. Scranton has a rich history and, I feel, that the area is on the cusp of a transformation period.

Many young professionals and startup companies are popping up in Lackawanna County and that can only help the area move towards being the city I always knew it could be. So what does this have to do with Joe? Well, he always visits and speaks very highly of his birthplace. It’s nice to hear positive talk about my hometown and I love Joe for that!

 2. Joe Loves Costco

Photo Courtesy: Buzzfeed

Photo Courtesy: Buzzfeed

Wherever Joe goes he has a good time…and that includes trips to Costco. Quite some time ago, Buzzfeed published an article about Joe’s trip to a Costco in Washington D.C. There are a series of amazing photos chronicling Joe’s trip through the store. He’s meeting, greeting and buying a bunch of shit. How can you not love a man who can have that much fun at a Costco?

Check out the article chronicling Joe’s Costco adventure here!

3. He Doesn’t Take Himself That Seriously

I’m sure that there are times when Joe’s job is a bit stressful. The good thing about Joe is that he has the ability to leave work at the office and get a little wild after quitting time.

There are many examples floating around the web of Biden gone wild, but this one is my absolute favorite so far. This video debuted at the White House Correspondents Dinner held last night. Check out the cameos from Julia Louis-Dreyfus and Michelle Obama!

Joe, if you’re reading this, know that I love you lots and don’t change for anyone. Jill Biden…it’s on!


Songs That Could Have Been

I always love hearing about songs that were originally offered to one artist and the other artist who was wise enough to take said jam and run all the way up the musical charts.

For example, did you know that Since You’ve Been Gone was originally offered to Hilary Duff, but Lil Lizze Mcguire turned that shit down. As we all know, Kelly Clarkson picked that up and it was a HUGE hit. I will say that I am a fan of H. Duff, but I can only imagine Clarkson conveying that deep, deep man rage.

Another example…Nicole Scherzinger was offered We Found Love but turned it down because she was “busy at the time.” Who’s wearing the regret cap now, eh Nicole?! 

There are tons of hit songs out there that were originally written for one artist and were scooped up by others. It’s like these pop singers sit around trading these songs like baseballs cards or something. Below is one song that fits this particular bill and the other two are just covers that I really like. Guess which one is which and you’ll win a prize!

Beyoncé – In Da Club

Remember when 50 Cent blew us out of the water with this song? Well shorty…just like every thing else…Beyonce did it better. Boom.

Britney Spears  - Telephone

While the Britney version is 98% autotuned…I obviously like this better than the GaGa version. You’re probably thinking “typical Kari response.” Well I don’t like change so…Britney forever!

Alanis Morissette – My Humps

Alanis has turned this upbeat, dance jam into a slow, slow jam that sounds like she wrote this crying alone in a dark room. I’m still waiting for someone to answer the question: What you gon’ do with all that junk? All that junk inside your trunk?


My Summer Song Has Arrived: “West Coast”

Photo Courtesy: www.idolator.com

Photo Courtesy: http://www.idolator.com

Even though I am a fan of the East Coast, Lana Del Rey is putting up a pretty good argument for the West Coast.

Debuting this jam at Coachella, this will be the first single off of Lana’s third studio album “Ultraviolence” and I couldn’t be happier.

While this isn’t the official music video, take a look at Lana spinning around on the beach with some oddly good-looking dude with long beautiful blonde locks.

As we know, I am a fan of the redic lyrics Lana sings and this time is no different. Lyrics to listen out for:

On the balcony and I’m singing / Ooh baby, ooh baby, I’m in love / I can see my sweet boy swinging / He’s crazy and Cubano como yo my love

Be on the lookout for a black on black Ford Fiesta blasting this song all. summer. long.

 

 


Remember When…Snooki was Snooki

Photo Courtesy: autos.aol.com

Photo Courtesy: autos.aol.com

Well, it looks like the party is officially over. Just 19 months after birthing her first child Lorenzo, Snooki…I mean Nicole Polizzi has announced she is with child number 2.

Snooks announced her pregnancy via her website, saying “Jionni and I are so excited to confirm that we are expecting our second child! Now knowing that our test results are good and our baby is healthy, we can finally talk about it!”

This is the third and final nail in the coffin that was Snooki. The first nail was getting pregs with baby number 1. The second nail was Snooki’s announcement that she didn’t want to be called Snooki anymore. Ugh. The third nail is this second pregnancy announcement. Things will never be the same. I’m heartbroken.

I know I should be happy for Snooks and Jionni, but I miss the old Snooki who wondered “where’s the beach?” and drank until her legs wouldn’t work. Am I the only one that misses those days?! So with this post, I would like to relive the good ole’ Snooki days.

Where’s the Beach?!

Let’s be honest, who hasn’t been on the boardwalk and wondered where the beach was? I think the best part of this scene was that even though JWow and Deena finally caught up with Snooks, she still managed to slip out of their grasp and face plant into the sand.

I’m just glad that one time I was looking for the beach wasn’t caught on film.

The Meaning of True Friendship

Who remembers when the meatballs roamed the Shore? I will never forget Snooki and her bestie Deena cruising for dudes and drinking booze. I mean, what else is there to do when you’re on vacation?

Photo Courtesy: www.ivillage.com

Photo Courtesy: http://www.ivillage.com

Some of the Meatball quotes that will stand the test of time:
  • “It’s only, like, Jersey girls that can dance so hard their underwears come off.” – Deena
  •  “Everybody Google it. Because that’s why the water is salty. From the f**king whale sperm.” – Snooki
  • “I just didn’t want my cuca to come out.” – Snooki
  • “Doing eyelashes when you’re buzzed is not a good time.” – Deena

Putting Fashion Above All

Remember back in Miami when Snooki bought these sweet shades? She was so committed to fashion that she would rather be blind than look like a fool. “The glasses are pretty much all crystalled out, all bling-bling, but when you put them on you can’t really see. . . so I don’t think you can’t drive with them. . . because you’ll get a ticket,” said Snooki. Who wants to bet she tried to drive with these on?

Snooki, I understand you’re a grown up and have a family, but can’t you let loose a few times a year (and let MTV film it)? I mean, who is going to teach me what to wear and new ways to refer to my cuca?

There are many, many more classic Snooki moments, please share your favs!

 

 

 

 

 


Lohan’s Hit List

Oh boy…Oprah is going to be pissed about this one!

Photo Courtesy: InTouch Weekly

Photo Courtesy: InTouch Weekly

In case you haven’t heard, Lindsay Lohan has come through for us again…in a big, big way! She allegedly wrote down all the dudes she slept with and somehow InTouch Weekly “obtained a copy.”

The list was allegedly written on January 30, 2013 at the Beverly Hills Hotel and Lindsay was allegedly there with friends and allegedly wrote down all 36 of her conquests. After showing off the list, she casually tossed it aside and someone scooped it up and skipped right to the InTouch Weekly office.

I would now like to share my thoughts on a few of the men who Herbied Lindsay (get it?).

Joaquin Phoenix aka J. Phoenix

I’m really hoping this was in his “I’m Still Here” phase where he grew that crazy beard and went all crazy. I’m going to throw this out there and say he must have got his hands on that bad batch of molly that was floating around Philadelphia a few months ago. I mean that would be the only logical explanation as to why Joaquin retired from acting after winning an Oscar to become a rap star. I can actually see Linds being down with that, you know, because I know her.

Colin Farrell

Just remember…Britney hit that first.

Zac Efron aka Zack Effron

Photo Courtesy: www.mtv.com

Photo Courtesy: http://www.mtv.com

I have two points I’d like to make about this:

1. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

2. Well, at least she knew his name…that’s really all we can ask for.

Justin Timberlake

I pretty much thought all of the dudes Lindsay listed were legit until I saw Timberlake. I’m sure billions of women around the world say they have slept with Justin, but I really can’t see our girl Linds closing the deal on this one. I will say that I really hope this burns Jessica Biel! Why do I say that? Because he belongs with BRITNEY! I mean how many times do I have to say it!? Biel…step aside!

Anywho, there were some other famous dudes named on the list, such as Adam Levine, Max George (That guy from The Wanted) and even James Franco. A lot of the names were blurred…I’m sure in three days time all will be revealed.

Thanks Linds!


Celebrity Kids with Celebrity Godparents

A few weeks ago, I saw a picture of Jaime King, her boo and her new baby boy James Knight. Topher Grace and Jessica Alba were also in the photo because they have received the honor of being the baby’s godparents.

While there are some religious undertones to the role of a godparent, the secular definition, according to Wikipedia, states that a godparent is “an individual chosen by the parents to take an interest in the child’s upbringing and personal development.”

This got me thinking about other celebrity babies and their godparents. Here are three celebrity godparents that made me say no way, oh wow or that seems odd.

The King of Pop and Nicole Richie

Photo Courtesy: www.justjared.com

Photo Courtesy: http://www.justjared.com

Yes, Michael Jackson is Nicole’s godparent, but that is not the most shocking thing I learned. Did you know that Lionel Richie is not Nicole’s biological father! When Nicole’s biological parents could no longer provide for her, Lionel was kind enough to take Nicole in. That makes me feel so pro-Lionel, that I will link to one (and only) Lionel jam I love.

Drew Barrymore and Frances Bean

Photo Courtesy: http://www.popsugar.com

Photo Courtesy: http://www.popsugar.com

I never really thought to put Courtney Love, Kurt Cobain and Drew Barrymore in the same social group. Now that think back, Drew used to party her face off and Courtney still does so it’s only natural that these two collided at one point.

Believe it or not, they were actually besties a few lifetimes ago. Back in 2007, Drew stated, “Courtney and I have not seen each other in a while, so I haven’t had the pleasure of being in Frances’s life for a few years. That’s a great loss for me, and I hope to reconnect with her.”

Frances, give Drew a call!

Jake Gyllenhall and Jamie Lee Curtis

Photo Courtesy: www.people.com

Photo Courtesy: http://www.people.com

I would have never thought to put these two together. Jamie Lee is a close friends of Gyllenhall’s parents so it makes sense. Hey, at least these two hang out!

If you have some other surprising god parents, please share!


Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 215 other followers