Has our little jail-bird been let out of her cage for good? Almost.
La Lohan appeared in court today and finally got some good news. Judge Sautner took Lohan off probation, which stems back all the way to her 2007 DUI arrest.
According to Us Weekly, Lindsay said “Oh My God” when she heard the good word that Judge Sautner passed her way.
But let’s not get ahead of ourselves…Lohan is still on probation for that darn necklace incident. Boo you whore.
Jesse Metcalfe was a celebrity?
Ahh yes. You remember Jesse…he played Eva Longoria’s gorgeous gardener on “Desperate Housewives.”
Let’s be real…no one blames Eva for breaking the 7th or 8th commandment and getting intimate with him. She couldn’t disappoint the women of America!
Anywho, Mr. Metcalfe was born Dec. 9, 1978 in Carmel Valley, California…he is 33 years young and still no sign of wrinkles!
Jesse kickstarted his acting career where most stars get their debut…on the soaps. Jesse played Miguel Lopez-Fitzgerald on NBC’s ”Passions.”
Then in 2004, Jesse landed the role of gardener John Rowland…sigh. Fun Fact: Jesse has actual landscaping experience! He worked for his stepfather’s landscaping business back when he was a teenager. In an article with USAToday, Jesse revealed “I can mow lawns, weed-whack, plant flowers. Whatever you need me to do.” What a man!
Obviously, the next step for Jesse was the big screen. In 2006, Jesse starred in his first film “John Tucker Must Die” alongside Sophia Bush and Brittany Snow. It was a typical high school movie, which means I loved it. Surprisingly, the film made a little over $68 million worldwide.
At this point, Jesse was living the dream. But things started to go downhill…quickly. In March of 2007 Jesse checked into rehab for alcoholism…sad face.
Following that, Jesse had the unfortunate mishap of falling off a balcony in 2008. No, not kidding. While hosting the World Music Awards, Jesse was hanging out and sitting on the ledge of a balcony. All of a sudden he toppled backwards and fell about 30 feet! His rep told the media that Jesse had a “couple of glasses of champagne.” Umm…wasn’t he in rehab for that?
After a few years of starring in movies no one has seen, Jesse is really trying for that thing called a comeback. He landed a role on the reboot of the classic TV series “Dallas,” which is premiering in June.
Jesse – I am here to offer you a few tips on a successful comeback:
- For a real life example, call Britney instead of Lindsay
- Don’t swear on live TV
- No drinking around balconies
- If in doubt…just take your shirt off
Good Luck – Love, Kari
A few days ago I was cruising home from Philadelphia and decided to plug my sweet, sweet iPod in and hit the shuffle button. After a boatload of Britney and Rihanna jams, a song by Eminem ft. Dr. Dre popped up. The song is called “Business” and it encompasses a good beat and some superb lyrics. My fav: ”Bitches and gentlemen it’s showtime.”
You can find “Business” on Marshall’s fourth album “The Eminem Show.” It was released July 7, 2003 and was the fifth single off the album.
I feel like you should give this song a listen for the sole fact that Eminem and Dr. Dre are using super hero language, such as:
- “Holy wack, unlyrical lyrics Andre, you’re fuckin’ right”
- “To the rapmobile, let’s go…”
- “Gee willikers Dre, holy bat syllables”
This Tuesday I have chosen a gentleman that is famous for two reasons. He dated the Queen of Pop and likes to pose for photos in his birthday suit…I can dig it.
Now that I have you on the edge of your seat…
Remember that time Madonna dated Jesus?
I’d like to thank Madonna for providing me with a plethora of jokes and introducing me to her version of Jesus.
Jesus Luz is a man of mystery. What I do know about him is very little, but I will share the knowledge I have acquired about this beautiful, beautiful man.
Let’s start out with the most obvious item…his name.
During a phone conversation with Interview Magazine, Jesus revealed how his obtained that biblical name. “My father [gave me] my name because he always admired Jesus Christ as the most philosophical mind of all time. So, when he named me, in his heart and his head, he made a deal, like, I’m going to name you Jesus so everything good in life is going to come to you because they’re going to make the homage to Jesus.” Into it.
Jesus was born in Rio de Janeiro which explains that precious Brazilian skin tone. This man was born to be a model. His first modeling gig was at Fashion Rio in 2007 which led him to a huge shoot in W magazine that gave him tons of exposure…literally.
Basically Jesus is famous because he dated Madonna. They met while shooting a fashion spread in W magazine. The relationship lasted for a whole year! Rumor has it Jesus was the one who initiated the split because the couple had nothing in common.
Honestly, do you really need to talk to each other? I’d just stare at him until he got weirded out and walked briskly away.
Jesus – Looking at you is like staring at the sun. Your eyes burn and you lose the ability to see for a period of time, but it’s worth the pain. Can I send you my optometry bill? If not, I’m always willing to send you my pager number. Get at me.
Firstly, I must apologize for the lack of posting. I just completed the worst week of the year…finals week. But I have great news…I’m back and hopefully better than ever.
Like most of America, I’m a part of the “Mad Men” phenomena and last evening was the long-awaited season five premiere. In preparation for this glorious day I have been rewatching past episodes and reliving the 1960s with Don, Betty, Roger, etc.
While the main focus of the show is on Don Draper and the men of Sterling, Cooper, Draper, Price…I’d like to highlight my three favorite female characters.
This one is for the ladies!
Starting out as a secretary and clawing her way to become the first female copywriter at the firm, Peggy is now Don’s second in command. This lady has certainly earned an Independent Woman badge.
Peggy is played by Elizabeth Moss who actually is a Scientologist in real life…mind blow…but that’s besides the point.
When you first meet Peggy, she comes off as a churchgoing straightedge kinda gal, but as I get to know her more and more…I’m finding out that Peggy is cooler than I am. Watch the clip below and you’ll agree.
Ahh yes…the original Mrs. Draper. Betty is a classy, strong woman who doesn’t take shit from anyone…including her kids. For example:
Sally (Betty’s daughter): You’re mean.
Betty: You betcha!
My fav Betty moment involves pigeons, a cigarette and a shotgun. It doesn’t get any better than this.
Last but certainly not least…Joan Holloway is the type of woman I want to be when I grow up. She’s got class, sass and woos every man she comes into contact with. Joan can also play the accordion. Holla at me if you know where I can get accordion lessons!
Joan is played by the fabulous Christina Hendricks and I wouldn’t mind waking up tomorrow as Joan or Christina…yes I’m serious.
If you are currently looking for a roommate…Joan offers some sweet, sweet tips on how to land a perfect housemate…watch below!
That’s all for this evening…Tune in Sundays at 10 p.m. on AMC for brand new “Mad Men” episodes.
Katy Perry has officially released her video for “Part of Me.” While I’m still on the fence about whether or not I love the video interpretation of the song, I can’t deny that it’s empowering to women.
Katy – After seeing this video, I’m pretty sure no one will mess with you…ever.
Rumor has it that national treasure Reese Witherspoon and her second husband Jim Toth are expecting a baby…an actual baby!
This will be baby number three for Reese…The “Cruel Intentions” star has two children (Ava, 12 and Deacon, 8) with ex-husband, Ryan Phillippe. Still upset about that divorce : (
UsWeekly had the pleasure of breaking the story and is reporting that ”Reese is right around 12 weeks,” one source explains, adding that the “This Means War” star is “not planning to announce it.”
Reese’s birthday is tomorrow…guess she has something a little extra to celebrate. You go girl.
So in honor of “The Hunger Games,” it’s time to explore the male counterparts to Katniss. More specifically, let’s talk about Liam Hemsworth, the guy who plays Gale. While he may be Miss Miley Cyrus’ bf, it’s important to recognize that their relationship is probably not as strong as the connection we all saw in the movie. So rather than comment on his current relationship with the train-wreck, let’s talk about his finer points (and no, I’m not talking about his acting talents).
Let the pics speak for themselves. But if you like what you see, go support him this weekend as the ultimate anti-hero Gale.
Hmm, maybe this one will be better…
So Liam, if you ever get tired of Miley or Katniss, call me (or Kari, she’d be down too)
On Monday, Kari and I were treated to an advanced showing of the latest teen novella craze, “The Hunger Games.” As a fan of the books (note the use of fan, not die-hard, all-knowing, and emotionally attached super enthusiast), I was excited to see the film adaptation.
While I was impressed with the translation of the book to motion picture, there were some cinematic difficulties that were hard to overcome. The first 20 minutes of the film were pretty shaky, and I found myself craving a wide-angle shot (something I don’t ever think I never imagined I would desire). The constant close-ups on the faces of the actors and a really shaky camera was obviously a stylistic choice made at the expense of content.
But, the books and the storyline speak for themselves and the movie was still an overall hit. That being said, as a professor I thought I would share some lessons I learned from watching the picture.
1. I want to form an alliance with Jennifer Lawrence
Rooney Mara take note: Jennifer Lawrence is epic. After watching her in “Like Crazy” this weekend, its impressive to see the scope of her acting talents. And oh yeah, she kicks ass in all fight scene. If I was to head into the games, I want her on my team.
2. 142 minutes is not enough
The books are long, the movie is long, and yet I wanted more. Some critical roles were taken out of the film that made a big difference in the books. It will be interesting to see how they handle it in the next couple of movies. I would have liked a few extra minutes spent in District 12 or the capital, but I’m assuming that could come later.
3. Don’t take Harry Potter for granted
I think I have falsely made the assumption that if the book was good, then it shouldn’t be too difficult to turn it into a good move. Harry Potter is a good example of a good book series made into a good movie series. I always knew that the sacrifices in the HP movies were for the greater good and wouldn’t totally effect the viewing experience. I didn’t have that same level of trust with this film. There was something that put me on edge and made me stress over the parts that were removed and the implications it could have for the next two parts.
Overall, the movie was pretty well done and I give it a solid B+.
It’s time to strap on your life vest once again…I’m about to reveal the second celebrity that I would like to accompany me on a cruise.
There is one thing I know about Katy Perry…she loves a good theme and always dresses for the occasion. Show of hands…who would like to see a week’s worth of Katy’s sailor attire? I know I do.
The list of people who don’t like Katy Perry is very small. I think the reason for that is she’s always full of pep, has a positive attitude and likes to party.
Even going through a divorce, she was still smiling. No really, Katy added a smiley face next to her signature on the divorce papers. o0o0o burn.
The Part of Me” singer must have learned the oh-so-important lesson brought to you by Xtina Aguilera…when it comes to men, they can’t hold us down.
Anywho, I picture Katy bopping around the cruise deck meeting and greeting fans during the day and performing her mega-hits at night.
I recently read that Katy is finally collaborating with her bff Rihana. Hopefully Rihanna can helicopter in and perform with Katy while we are cruising the ocean blue. If not, I’m sure Snoop Dog will be on board to sing his notable verse in “California Gurls“…he can’t be that busy.
Or if we are really lucky, Kanye “I’mma let you finish” West will swim out to the boat in order to perform his verse in “E.T.“
Hey, a girl can dream. See you on board!